Today is the halfway point in my yoga teacher training and I can't help but feel a fire returning to my belly, twinges of sharpness sparking in my mind and a smoothing of the ragged edges of my spirit. The days swell large and full with air heavy with humidity and sunshine broadening the hibernating limbs into expansive openness. Joints are lubricated with continuous practice and the mind is active in an attempt to capture the feeling of this space so it can be packed up when I leave and carted home.
The swelling of days is fluid like the waves of the ocean a constant undulation rising and falling like breath beneath the monkey calls, buzzing insects and caws of birds that ring with intensity to greet the sun and fall further into the background through the heat of the day only to hum and ring louder with the setting sun.
The fullness of our intensive training schedule feeds layer upon layer of information swelling our minds with sanskrit, anatomy, asanas (postures), assists, history and philosophy of yoga which evoke deep questions of faith and spirit as our bodies are challenged to find the balance between effort and ease. Just as the ocean is undulating in the background, our breath is the soft marker of time within us. It grows stronger in the morning as our asana practice stretches and strengthens our bodies, we root within and connect to that breath, harnessing it to focus the mind and balance the body. The breath settles into the background with the ocean as we transition from student to teacher-in-training and our brains expand to accept more knowledge and our hands energize to help others into postures. Meals break up the day and time quickens at breaks so that eating, studying, showering, beach time and rest are taken in sips.
Despite the fullness of days and heightened pace, I am not fatigued. Those frayed edges of myself are knitting back together. My mind is understanding and my body is strengthening. I arrived here with the goal of acceptance and I find that acceptance comes easier each day.