Monday, November 17, 2008

Reality

You know how lawyers on tv and in movies always work late and order Chinese food? They are usually supposed to be "preparing for trial" or "writing a brief" or "negotiating a merger" but what is generally portrayed is a handful of very attractive people dressed impecably picking at various items with chopsticks in those Chinese takeout boxes with the little wire handle thing and flirting or "hashing things out" or exchanging witty repartee with co-workers. The part that is never portrayed is pretty much how my evening has gone.

630-ish Realize I'm staying late and need to order dinner
642 Receive confirmation email that my online food order has been received by the restaurant (fancy and convenient, I know) and will arrive in 40-55 minutes
700-ish Remarkably early phone call from delivery guy indicating food is in the lobby
705-ish Take the elevator down to the lobby (I delayed because I could hear street noise when the guy called and I knew he was calling me a block before he arrived)
710 me, waiting in the lobby for the delivery guy who is not showing up
715 me, back at my desk, irritated he called me way too early, receive call #2 from delivery guy. He swears he is waiting in the lobby. Mad, I head back down 18 flights on the slow elevator to discover NO FOOD GUY!
720 I am back at my desk, fuming over the 20 minutes I've wasted and the fact I still don't have any food. I call the restaurant to complain.
721 The delivery guy calls again and I put the restaurant on hold. The guy insists he is waiting in the lobby. I repeat the address of my building multiple times and he claims that is where he is. I don't believe him. He then says he is at 42nd street or something . . . only 10+ blocks away!
728 Delivery guy calls again and swears he is now "in the lobby, please"
730 I finally return to my desk to eat my now somewhat cold massaman curry. Only, I've mostly lost my appetite.

Oh, and I am far from impeccably dressed. I purposely selected my roomiest pants to wear in prepartion for a late work night. And I am not hashing anything out with anyone, I am editing a brief and passing my comments to a junior associate ensconsed in her own office down the hall. The only repartee involves me interpreting my scribbled comments for her.

TV lawyers have it so easy . . .

2 comments:

Tiffany said...

Your reality show is funny. Sorry about late, cold food. That is the WORST!

David said...

Maybe you should have gone to school to be a TV lawyer instead . . .

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