Wednesday, January 23, 2008

You Asked

From Beck:
1. What are you looking for in a man? What is your dream man like?
Wow, these are two big questions. I will start with dream man and work down to reality from there. Ideally, he would be very tall - I prefer the 6'2" to 6'4" range, have dark features and be fairly rugged (yes, I am a sucker for tall, dark and handsome). He would make me laugh and be my best friend. He would love be my buddy and would love traveling the world with me as much as lounging around the house with me when we felt lazy. He would love that I am often a sports fanatic and enjoy that I like to show my love through baking. My dream man would love me for my ambition and not make assumptions about my choices. He would share my life view and at least be aiming toward the same spiritual plane (whether we are even or not being a lesser detail). And above all else, he would feel lucky to have me and I would feel lucky to have him. . . . As for the reality part, I understand love requires compromise so despite the fact that I would love to marry a man who shares a significant amount of interests and hobbies with me, I feel it is all to be judged on a sliding scale. So maybe he isn't the tallest boy I've ever dated but he sweeps me off my feet, treats me well and causes my pulse to race . . . other things become less important and lists are abandoned so long as he meets the three criteria my wise father outlined for me long ago: 1) be physically attracted to each other (yeah, I'm not marrying anyone without it!); 2) be each other's best friend; and 3) have the same long-term spiritual goals. With those three elements as a foundation, I could be flexible on a lot of other traits.
2. Would you like to stay in New York City?
I love living in New York City. There is an energy and pulse to the City that is unlike anywhere else I have ever lived or visited. That being said, that same energy can wear you out, which is why I often hole up in my sanctuary of an apartment to escape it all (while taking advantage of the unique perk of being able to order any kind of food I can dream up for delivery while doing so) or plan long weekends and vacations to places so very different from here with lots of trees and mountains and nature. At the moment I don't have any plans to leave but my dream of an ideal life includes a husband, kids, a dog and lots of camping (in other words, something similar to my childhood) in addition to the concerts, museums and culture that is offered by New York sooooo I guess I will just have to wait and see what options present themselves. For now, I'm here until further notice.

From Meghan (welcome!!):
What kind of law do you practice? Do you like it or would you rather practice some other aspect of law?
Let's see, I can describe my practice as Creditor's Rights and Bankruptcy (which is the official title of my practice group), Financial Restructuring or Corporate Bankruptcy. Essentially what I do is represent various banks, financial institutions and corporations who are owed money (lots of money) by insolvent companies that have either already filed bankruptcy or are on the verge of filing bankruptcy. As boring as it might sound (and it sounded excruciatingly dull to me in law school), I love it. I started out my career in corporate litigation which is what I thought I wanted but turned out that was the boring stuff and what I do now is exciting to me. . . most of the time. I don't envision myself practicing any other type of law in my career at this point, although the more hours I work the more I daydream about working "in-house" for a corporation with a set time-table and no billable hours.
Even though you don't know me, can I come and crash on your couch sometime? With husband and three kids? (Was that too far?)
If Emily gives you a letter of recommendation and you bring Cafe Rio I might think about it. . . the kids would be extra of course.

From Tiffany:
1. What have you learned in your thirties that you never knew in your twenties?
What? Did you say I'm "in" my thirties?? That sounds much older than I feel . . . I think I have learned to have more patience (shocking since I have very little of it now!) and I have more self-confidence (even though, again I'm still working on this - mostly I feel I would have a LOT more self-confidence if I could just have the body I had at 20 or 25 or even 28). I made a lot of mistakes in judgment when I was younger simply because I didn't realize what I had to offer.
2. What is the best and worst thing about being the oldest child?
Wow, this one is tougher than I thought it would be. I will start with the worst thing - the blame. As a kid everything was my responsibility. I was the oldest, I should know better, blah, blah, blah. Or at least that is how I felt. This sense of responsibility has continued into adulthood. I feel responsible for my siblings, I feel responsible when I plan something that everyone enjoys it and while this can be a positive it can also be exhausting!
The best thing about being the oldest is my relationship with my mother. I don't mean to take anything away from the unique relationships each of my siblings have with her but I think being the oldest child enhances that bond somehow. Oh, and in other cons of being the oldest - my parents were never strict but they definitely had more rules with me than my younger siblings. I was lectured like you wouldn't believe after I put a second hole in one of my ears. But my sister later punched holes up around both ears and got a belly button ring AND pierced her tongue and my parents didn't say a word. . . the oldest has it rough, right? I guess I just wore them out.
3. If you could swap jobs with anybody for a week, who would it be and why?
I don't want to be famous or anything but I think it would be fun to have my own talk show for a week - like Oprah or Tyra. I think the best part would be having my own stylists for a week who would do my hair, makeup and pick out perfect outfits with amazing shoes for me to wear and I wouldn't have to think about it at all. I think I would enjoy having that mic and spewing out all my opinions and asking questions. I would probably want to give away some free stuff while I'm at it. But I don't think I would want to do it for more than a week and I am quite sure neither Oprah nor Tyra would be a fan of keeping my job for even a week.

From Katie:
1. if you had to eat at chain restaurant which would be your choice? I know you hate them. (first off, to my anonymous commenter . . . I will have you know my snobbery is aimed primarily towards franchise restaurants of which Cafe Rio is not . . . yet. But Cafe Rio is the one place I would support with my own money if they would please consider branching out to New York City!!)
And yes, Katie, I am not a fan of franchise food but on occasion logistics require I set aside my snobberies and dig in and I have to say my top choice is usually Wendy's for fast food (I have a spicy chicken sandwich about once a year) and I don't even know what I would choose if I had to eat at one of the TGIFriday's/Applebee's varieties because I don't even have a secret weakness for any of them. I do really like California Pizza Kitchen if that counts -- I love their pear and Gorgonzola pizza!
2. do you live close to Heath Ledger? He died today (yesterday now). Do you live close to any celebrities?
I heard about Heath Ledger - very sad, he was so beautiful and I realized he might have been my celebrity crush when I was reading an article about his death and remembering him in 10 Things I Hate About You and First Knight (I seriously loved that movie!). He lived in SoHo and I live in midtown so I'm not close.
I live on the outer edges of Manhattan and to my knowledge there aren't any celebrities who live close by but as you probably noticed from reading my blog I often see them at movie premiers at a theater I walk past on my way home from work and occasionally at the tv studios that are near my apartment. I probably miss a lot more than I see since I am usually pretty oblivious to other people when I'm walking around town.
3. if you could be with anyone for 24 hours, who would it be and why?
I was going to be snarky about this one but if I really had to choose I think it would be a certain ex-boyfriend who I can't say I have ever managed to get over. I admit that while he doesn't fit all the criteria I explained in my answer to Beck's question above, he was the best fit I have encountered and I would be lying if I didn't say I don't regret letting him go. I think if I could spend 24 hours with him I could either get final closure and put the fantasy thoughts to rest or we could realize we made a mistake breaking up four years ago and . . . who knows (that is the fantasy side thinking).

From Christian (Tiffany's son):
Who are your five favorite Jazz players and why?

Boozer leads the pack for me - I love when he is hot and yanking down rebounds and putting up high numbers.
Williams is a very close second and possibly first at times - he is a strong leader and has the ability to control the tempo of the game either by scoring or assisting. Love him.
Paul Millsap is in my top 5 - with only one year behind him he holds a lot of potential to develop into a huge threat. I like his dedication.
I love Matt Harpring because he is just plain tough. Announcers can never resist mentioning his football playing family because he is just a force.
Number 5 is a tough one to choose. I feel like I should say AK because when he is on he is ON! But I'm not sure I have forgiven him for last year's tantrum and trade demands. He still has some things to prove for me so I will go with Okur instead. But I also love the new guy Korver. He hustles and is amazing on the free throw line.

From Ryan (Tiffany's husband): (yeah for free counseling . . . I think?)
1. How do you feel about your mother? (Just kidding--typical psychologist joke.)
I love her!! She is the best - and I am not kidding!

2. How are you like your mom?

Unfortunately I inherited my mother's insecurities and my dad's arrogance which has resulted in a terrible dichotomy of snobbery and arrogance combined with self-consciousness and vulnerability. UGH!
But otherwise I am lucky enough to look a lot like my mother and to share her love of chocolate, old romantic movies and long conversations (with each other!). While I will on occasion discover I am doing something like my mother (usually related to cooking), I usually have that moment when I am doing something similar to my dad.
3. How have you internalized your mom's views/rules about life and how things should be?

Wow, I'm not even sure I understand this question. Ryan, you should probably give me a referral so I can spend some serious couch time sorting this out. I will say that I remember being afraid to admit I liked watching Night Court when I was young because I knew it annoyed my mom.
4. How have you internalized your mother's views of you?
Umm, there is that "internalized" word again. Not sure what to do with that. My mother thinks I am great so maybe I should internalize a bit more of that to overcome the insecurities I inherited from her . . . but not too much or else I will knock off the balance and become overly conceited and arrogant about how great I am. Wait, can you repeat the question? I'm completely lost here. I guess there is a reason I got a C in Psych 101 (alright, I probably pulled off a B or B+ but I remember feeling I deserved better).

From Michele:
1. who was your favorite new years kiss?
Michele, how could it be anyone but you? And before anyone gets the wrong idea Michele and I have a very long-standing joke about the oh so many New Year's Eves we have shared (and Dan was kind enough to share her on NYE even after they were married a couple of times). Unfortunately I am at a loss for an actual favorite New Year's kiss because to be honest I have had very few . . . at least in recent years.
2. who has been your favorite boy to kiss?
this is a tough one (especially with my mother reading!) but since I may not have ever recovered (see answer to question by Katie) I will have to say Matt. But mostly because we had a lot of goodbye airport kisses (he lived in Denver, I was in SLC) which are always a bit more tragic and therefore more passionate and intense. Everyone else seems a bit blocked out at the moment.
3. what is the secret to a great pie crust?
Hide it under really great pie filling!! Seriously, I think the secret for it looking good is to use shortening or lard but the secret to it tasting good and flaky (my favorite) is to use butter. I use this pate brisee recipe most often and usually refresh my skills with these tips for good measure. I prefer the taste with butter which is why I use it over shortening (never tried lard - it scares me!) even though it is more difficult to roll out and shape in the pan.
4. what is ganache?

Ganache is simply dark baking chocolate melted with hot cream (chop up the chocolate, place in a bowl, heat cream slowly not quite to boiling and add to chopped chocolate and stir until chocolate melts). You add more or less cream depending on how thick you want the ganache - thicker to make truffles and thinner to frost cupcakes. I have found ganache is good for practically everything and I have had fun playing with it despite its intimidatingly pretentious French name. Tiffany and I even made s'mores with some of my leftover ganache that keeps really well in the refrigerator for quite a long time (I don't think I've kept any over a month because I end up using it).

And that rounds out the Q&A for today. This took me a bit longer to answer than I anticipated primarily because I had a lot of work to make up for missing yesterday (home sick - even though I billed 6 hours!) AND then my computer dumped my memo I was working on and I lost 5 of my 7 pages and I had to REPEAT 4 hours worth of work!!! Miserable.

UPDATE FOR Emily's questions:

best kiss?
for the drama: roof top in NYC - at a friend's party, the wind was swirling, I was looking at the view with a friend of a friend, it was chilly . . . yadda, yadda, yadda . . . we went back to the party and never spoke again
for the romance: the promenade on the Mediterranean in Nice, France. A boy (incidentally from NYC) I met at dinner a few hours after getting dumped on the phone by my year-long boyfriend. He offered to take me on a yacht and I was smart enough to say no.
for love: first time Matt kissed me on his first trip to SLC. We were three weeks into a phone relationship and he walked past security, I was anxiously waiting for him hoping I hadn't forgotten what he looked like after not seeing him for a month and he walked straight up to me and gave me the best first kiss ever. I was sunk.
worst kiss?
my first kiss - miserable failure. I felt like I had been mauled by a bear. I'm lucky I was willing to try it again.
the second boy I kissed - also bad. I was chatting. Didn't want him to kiss me and I realize he was puckered up, eyes closed, closing in on my ear. I panicked and let him kiss me. ugh.
biggest regret
. . . tough one, I try not to regret much but . . . marrying the wrong person too fast, breaking up with another at the wrong time, dating boys out of boredom . . . not playing in the marching band at the U, letting myself gain 10 pounds
biggest relief
my dad not dying . . . all of the times he has tried
one thing you wish you had said to someone
I'm always looking back at what I should have said or should not have said so it is hard to pick just one thing. But to pick up on a theme of this post, I wish I had told Matt I wasn't ready to break up when we did.


Tiffany said...

I've been checking for your answers all day! This was very fun and fascinating. I think this should be a regular feature on all of our blogs.

Ryan read this with me and apologizes for having confusing questions.

emily said...

wait! i've had a busy week/month and i just got to your blog! i want to ask a question. but it is late and i am tired so i am going to have to ask tomorrow.

Beck said...

You need to PHONE THAT EX-BOYFRIEND. I phoned mine and look what happened.

Soul-Fusion said...

emily, feel free to ask away. I can supplement.

lizzie said...

um, i missed it too...loved your answers!

emily said...

best kiss, worst kiss?

biggest regret, biggest relief

one thing you wish you had said to someone

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