Wednesday, January 16, 2008

My Tiger Beat 5

I am stealing this idea to lighten the mood around here. The deal is you look back into those oh so embarrasing and awkward years of junior high and try and remember what teen heart-throb posters adorned your walls. Before I get to my list I will explain that my celebrity obsession stint was very short and was primarily isolated to 7th grade during which time I vividly remember begging my mom to buy Tiger Beat or some other teen mag so I could pull out the posters and dream of things I really did not understand.

Since that time my celebrity crushes (and real-life person crushes) are pretty few and far between. I actually remember realizing at some point in high school the futility of dreaming about someone who, for all intents and purposes just was not real so I decided to focus on actual boys I encountered in my life . . . unfortunately those crushes were also few and far between. Mostly because, once again, going back to 7th grade, I confided in a friend about my crush on Ben Kirscher (why do we always remember first and last names?) who made me laugh in history class and she decided to take things into her own hands and marched up to him and aaaaaaallllllllll of his bratty little 12-year old friends at lunch and asked him to "go with me". The request was completely unauthorized and because she wasn't much of a friend she marched back to me and told me before he could say anything his friend had blurted out "Alyssa is a dog!" and they all laughed. Um, yeah she told me that. Junior high is a wretched place. Sure, I wore a sailor hat for some inexplicable reason and I had a near-mullet with a bad perm, braces and red glasses and I COMPLETELY embraced the 80s and loved Molly Ringwald's "style" but I'm pretty sure that I looked fairly similar to all the other 80s loving kids roaming the halls of Bidwell Junior High. So I learned my lesson and generally kept any and all crushes in close check for the remainder of my junior high and high school years and that habit spilled into adulthood to the point that I rarely have crushes. Except on Miguel who makes my salad most days because he has a cute smile and an accent and always seems especially happy to see me and make my lunch. Otherwise I try to squelch (possibly a word) any crush before it crushes me like it did in 7th grade.

But to the task at hand. Thsi is my list of the boys who adorned my bedroom walls circa 1987-1988:
  1. Johnny Depp - of 21 Jump Street fame, he was by far my favorite - something about the dark brooding thing I guess.
  2. River Phoenix - probably due to Stand By Me, a very close second to Johnny Depp
  3. Kirk Cameron - because who didn't watch Growing Pains every day after school and love him?
  4. I'm pretty sure both Corey Haim and Corey Feldman were up there as well although I think I'm embarrased about that and I have no idea whether I liked one more than the other although I would think Feldman won out
  5. hmmm, can't come up with any more so just pretend Feldman is down here

And somehow, by moving away from California after 7th grade I forgot about those magazines and started decorating my walls with sports heros instead. Not because I had crushes on them, I just LOVED sports and embraced my tom boy side a bit more so Karl Malone and John Stockton dominated my walls instead.

I also feel I should mention that even before junior high I had one crush that I guarantee many of you shared with me if you were alive and alert in any way in 1984/1985 and that was Michael Jackson. I had stickers of him on my Trapper Keeper and posters in my room and my brother and I would beg my mom to play the Thriller album . . . as in vinyl . . . and we would do our best imitation of the Thriller moves we had tried our best to memorize while watching it at other kids' homes. Kids who were lucky enough to have MTV in their very own home of course. Nick was really good at the moonwalk and that leg shake thing. I don't believe I was good at anything but bouncing around too much and making the record skip.

So there you go. True confessions of 7th grade celebrity crushes. Now it is your turn to fess up. . . who were your Tiger Beat 5?

7 comments:

autumn said...

Oh, I had a lot of crushes. Michael Jackson was a big one. Johnny Depp has to top a girl's list at least once in their life. Dave Matthews was a big one as well, even though I was 16 and not in middle school which is a little sad. My high school was lacking in the crush department. I had to seek elsewhere.

katie said...

I'm pretty sure that John Stamos was too old for Tiger Beat but I loved him. I joined his fan club and I received an autographed picture. 100% authentic I'm sure.
I guess I've always had a thing for older men.

Soul-Fusion said...

I was completely in love with John Stamos and I would have included him in the list but you are right, just a bit too old to make the cut. I think he may have been the only reason anyone really watched Full House.
And Autumn, my music crushes never evolved to the poster worship and I was out of high school before I discovered Dave, otherwise I would include him. I will have to discuss music crushes elsewhere because there are a lot of voices I fall for. Still.

Beck said...

Oh, celebrity crushes. Let's see - when I was 13, I made a gigantic scrapbook about A-Ha with my best friend, and we were both convinced that cheekboney Norweigian men were the best looking men in the world. And then I had a crush on one of the Taylors from Duran Duran, Morrissey (wow, that was a great one), and half the guys in my high school. Heh.

lizzie said...

i have ALWAYS had a crush on someone and usually more than just one:
michael j fox
tom cruise
kirk cameron
numerous boys from school

and the crush of today:
jack bauer (kiefer sutherland)

Ben said...

Alyssa, sorry about the way you were treated back in the day. I just happen to be on the computer while standing duty on my submarine and what do you know, I came across this about me and junior high in Chico. Sorry about everyone hurting your feelings, I guess it's been 20 years. I hope all is well for you- Benjamin Kirscher

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